Zach Galifianakis Tribute

You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you've never been to that bar before. -- Zach Galifianakis 10/1/69 - Present

     I first became aware of Zach Galifianakis' stand-up from his appearance in the stand-up documentary 'The Comedians Of Comedy'.  But I had already met Zach Galifianakis the actor long before that.  So, I was his fan long before I even knew his name or knew about his Stand-up.  Once I saw him do stand-up though, I learned his name, and became a huge fan of his instantly.
     Zach's stand-up is amazing for lack of a better word.  His stage presence, delivery and timing are all enviable to me as a comic.  I'd give anything to work a stage like Zach does.  He is just completely FEARLESS in his humor and presentation and almost just seems to be in a comedy trance at times.  He always makes being hilarious look so damn easy.  I was instantly jealous watching him and also a huge fan.
     I began to seek out his comedy to study and watch it all and I was never disappointed.  Most of you probably already know him from The Hangover movies, but Zach Galifianakis truly shines on a comedy stage.  I've included a short clip below from one of his comedy specials as an example of his comic genius.  Enjoy,

You're Fired

     Getting fired isn't any fun at all.  It's a very lonely, and humbling experience.  But, on the plus side, it frees you up to finally be able to get to work planning your revenge against all those who have betrayed you.  Which, as we all know, is the most important, and rewarding job that you could ever have.

Liebster Blog Award

     The Armchair Squid has graciously presented me with The Liebster Blog Award so, in receiving this award Laughing at Life, 2 has now got some real blogging street cred.  I've finally made it Momma, Top of the world!
     Being presented with the prestigious Liebster Blog Award comes with a few responsibilities.  As a recipient of the award I need to give 11 fun facts about myself, answer the 11 questions about me that were asked by The Armchair Squid, then award a Liebster to 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.  Then if my choices for a Liebster are good enough to, they can in turn repeat those steps to keep this award going.

X-Ray's Are Magical!

     I thought naked was all there was, but now I'm dating this X-Ray tech chick, and she took this pic for me at work, and I can totally see all of this chicks bones.  Now, that's fkn naked.  As you can see, she's smoking hot, but just look at those birthing hips!  I mean wow!  I called my Mom right after seeing this pic to tell her that we were engaged.  I was that excited.  I hadn't asked her yet though, and she said no, but we still had sex on the bathroom floor so, it's cool.

Wreck-It Ralph Movie Review

     Wreck-It Ralph was the 2012 animated comedy from Walt Disney in which a video game villain gets sick of his role in his game as the bad guy and wants to be a hero.  So, he sets off on an adventure in the other games of the arcade to try to earn his medal, and finally become a hero.  Along his way he meets Vanellope von Schweetz, a glitchy young girl who is ostracized by the characters in her game.  Ralph then decides to help Vanellope to earn her place in her game, and to find acceptance.  
     It was a really great movie filled with humor, video game references, and many cameos by classic video game characters.  The stellar voice cast, led by John C. Reilly, and Sarah Silverman, do a fantastic job of bringing life, and hilarity to the characters, and drive the story of this sweet, funny film with a terrific message.  Wreck-It Ralph is a great family film that I would recommend to anyone.  Do yourself a favor and check this film out tonight!

Virgin Conspiracies - 'Cup Of Soup'

     Hi, I'm Stanley.  I'm 27, a level 29 elf mage in D & D, an Internet, and computer wizard, a very snappy dresser, a Mensa member, and a virgin.  I rent out the basement of my Moms house for free.  I love living with my Mom, I really do, and I love my Mommy tons but, I think she is lying to me about a lot of things.  I aim to find out using the wonderful tools of my soul mate, the Internet, to find out if she is.
     Mom says that if I moved out of her basement I'd find the world very cold, and hard to survive in.  Mom says that I wouldn't even be able to afford to feed myself on my measly six figure salary.  But, I have been doing some research, and I just discovered an affordable food item called 'Cup Of Soup'.

Underwear Model

     I want to be an underwear model.  It looks like it would be a lot of fun, and I know I would be great at it.  I have worn underwear since I was first out of diapers, and I've always worn them really well.  I am also incredibly sexy, which is very important in being an underwear model.  No one wants to see ugly people in just their underwear.  That's exactly why light switches have an off option now isn't it?  There is only one thing stopping me from being an underwear model.  I'm discriminated against for being overweight.

Tribute to Tenacious D

     Tenacious D, for those of you who don't know, is the greatest band ever, in the world, and the known universe.  This comedy rock duo powerhouse is comprised of lead singer Jack Black, and lead guitarist/vocalist Kyle Gass.  They have been rocking our socks off since they joined forces in 1994 combining their individual awesome sauces to create 'The D'.  So, if you didn't know, now you know.  If you aren't too scared to rock out hard, you can now watch the video that I have included below.

Stupidity Epidemic

     Science has let us down yet again by ignoring the biggest disease plaguing humanity today.  It is a disease that an overwhelming majority of the population is afflicted by, and all of society is affected by everyday.  I'm speaking of course about stupidity.  Stupidity is completely out of control, and something must be done to cease this epidemic right away before the stupidity epidemic is allowed to do more damage to our world than it already has.  So, like always, I have decided to fix this problem for the world myself.

Rockin' Out To A Literal 80's Video

     80's music was hilarious.  Now, I ain't going to lie, I liked it, I still do.  But music video's in the 80's were tremendously funny.  Heavy Metal, Pop, or Rap, it didn't matter.  Across every genre of music the video's were 99% comedies.  The greatest thing about 80's video's was they had absolutely nothing to do with the song.  
     Music videos were new, and the bands, nor their record companies had any idea what to do in them so, mostly they just made up some crazy concept for the video that they thought would be popular with viewers.  The result was a lot of wild videos that made no sense.  As an example I've included the literal video of the 80's song Safety Dance below to illustrate how the song would go if it matched it's video.  Enjoy,

Quick Fixes To ALL Your Problems!

     ALWAYS tackle your life's problems the quickest and easiest way you possibly can.  Try not to think at all, it just wastes time.  Trust me, I've solved all of my life's problems in the fastest and simplest way I possibly could and I'm doing AWESOME!
     The first step is drastically lowering your standard of what awesome is to a reachable level.  If you think your quality of life is low, it isn't, your standards are just way too high.  Be realistic, know what your limits are, and what you can achieve with the amount of effort you are willing to put in.  The second thing you need to do is stop caring.  If you don't care, you can't be disappointed.  So, stop caring, and you'll be happy in no time.  Third, and most importantly, avoid all your problems so that they can't bother you.  Are bill collectors hounding you?  Ask yourself, why am I answering the phone?  God invented caller id for a reason, shame on you if your not using it.
     See, all of your problems are now fixed, and you have plenty of time left for you, the only person that matters.  All that's left for you to do now is to send me $49.99 for fixing your life for you.  Once you do that you will finally feel complete. Oh, and by the way, your welcome.

Patton Oswalt Tribute

If you hit a midget on the head with a stick he turns in to forty gold coins -- Patton Oswalt

     Patton Oswalt is one of my favorite comics.  I have always loved his sense of humor ever since I first discovered him.  I am pretty sure that Patton could read the phonebook and make it hilarious.  His voice, and comic delivery are just that good.  You may already know Patton as the voice of Remy in the animated film Ratatouille, or as Spence Olchin on the TV show King of Queens, but until you have treated yourself to his stand-up, you don't yet know Patton Oswalt.  To better illustrate this point, I've included a clip of his stand-up below. Enjoy,

Obese People Dieting

     Obese people are dangerous when they are on a diet.  They are not to be trusted, ever.  Even the ones who are calm, and seem to be succeeding at their diet can turn on you.  Need proof?  Go up to any obese person on a diet and wave a Twinkie in their face, your liable to pull back a stub.  Of course that goes for all fat people though, Twinkies are endangered now.  Dammit, now I want a Twinkie too, and I wouldn't even know where to start looking for one.
     I mean just look at that delicious goodness up there.  How could nobody buy up Hostess and save the damn Twinkie from extinction?  Where were all of us fatties on that one?  Probably on some stupid diet that was destined to fail.  What other delectable foodstuffs must fall before we just accept, and learn to love our fat?  Our economy depends on us heavies to devour and consume junk food at unhealthy levels to survive.  So Super Size those fries, and maximize your thighs, or McDonald's might have to close next, and then our society would surely crumble.

NOT!!!

     'Not' is the greatest trump card invented by children EVER!  The word 'Not' makes it April Fools day ALL the time.  It's brilliant, and incredibly versatile.  Here are just a few of the billions of examples of how you can use the word 'Not';

- You look great in those pants... NOT!!!

- Yeah, I have that money I owe you... NOT!!!

- Yes, of course it's your baby... NOT!!!

     It's amazing how great just three little letters can be.  The possibilities are endless when your not inhibited by maturity.

McDouble - The Conspiracy

     At McDonald's, do you know what the difference is between a double cheeseburger and a McDouble besides thirty cents in price?  One piece of cheese y'all, that's it.  A double cheeseburger has two slices of cheese, and a McDouble only has one.  That may seem like a rip-off but, what people don't realize is, that missing piece is that melvita cheese.  It's true.  It takes fat folk taste buds to catch it, but it's a fact.

Laughing News, vol7

Laughing News, vol7

Comedy news you can trust

In The Headlines...

     Cookie Monster attacked a 2yr old boy in Times Square because the child's parents couldn't supply the $2 for the picture they had taken with the monster quickly enough.  When Cookie Monster demanded his payment and was told he would have to wait while the father of the boy got some cash, he became enraged and pushed the stroller so hard the boy flew out into the street.  Elmo, who also posed for the picture, couldn't be reached for comment.

     A southwest Ohio day care worker has been charged with assault for biting a 5 year old child to teach him not to bite others.  The 56 year old day care worker, who is apparently a moron, was released without bail because our justice system is inept.

     In Montana a man who doesn't carry a wallet on advice from his chiropractor has $500 eaten by his dog.  When he had stopped for dinner he left the dog in the car with 5 $100 bills and a $1 bill.  The dog ate all the hundreds but left the dollar unharmed because it's all about the Benjamin's baby.  The man salvaged the scraps of the money from the dogs droppings, and sent them into the treasury in hopes of having it returned to him.

Karate Kid Tribute

     I think Karate Kid started the entire comedy action flick movie genre.  The scene where Mr Myagi is drunk and singing and taking a sledgehammer to that car is a hilarious and classic scene.  Wax on wax off?  Forget about it. 
     Pat Morita's Mr. Miyagi was lovable, believable, and hilarious.  Karate Kid actually has a lot of comedy to it despite it's story of Daniel-Son moving into a new town and having a run in with the local Blond, stuck up yuppie karate guy gang leader from the Cobra-Kai school.  Daniel-Son makes the mistake of flirting with the bad ass, karate stud, gang leaders girlfriend, and gets himself nearly beaten to death before being saved by his new apartments maintenance man.  This meeting begins a friendship and a mission to train Daniel-Son to win the Karate tournament against the preppy white boy gang from Cobra-Kai and regain his honor.

Jay and Silent Bob Tribute

     Jay and Silent Bob are fictional characters created by filmmaker Kevin Smith who are played by Jason Mewes, and Kevin Smith himself.  They are the hilarious, dope dealing, heterosexual life mates that have stolen scenes in most of Smith's films, and are easily the characters that he is most known for.  Since Jay and Silent Bob are such staples in comedy, I felt they needed a tribute here at Laughing at Life, 2.

     There isn't much to this comedy duo, which is probably why they are so great.  There are all jokes, and no complications.  Jay is the loudmouth, vulgar, and funny ringleader, and Silent Bob is his ever present, overweight, and weirdly wise sidekick.  They grew up hanging outside the Quick Stop convenience store but, had many other adventures including protecting the last scion as prophets, rescuing a monkey from a research lab for Jay's girlfriend Justice, and stopping a Hollywood film starring characters based on them from being made.  Never learning any lessons, or growing in the slightest, this comedy duo more than earned their place in my heart.

     For more Jay and Silent Bob watch the video I've included below..,

Idiocracy - Movie Review

     As part of a top secret project conducted by the Pentagon two Americans, Private Joe Bauers, and Rita a prostitute, are put under as test subjects for the "Human Hibernation Project".  Joe, and Rita are only supposed to be under for a year but, the officer in charge of the operation, and the only one who knows that the two are in hibernation, gets busted and sent away, and the two of them don't awaken for 500 years.  What they find is that in 2505 the world is ran by stupid people, and corporate entities, because the morons have out bred the intelligent folks, and Joe is now easily the smartest man alive.

Holiday Meals

     The secret ingredient to any holiday dinner is sitting across the dinner table from a father-in-law who cannot stand you and doesn't respect you.  Nothing brings out the flavor of your holiday meals like large amounts of disapproval and guilt.  For maximum flavor and enjoyment of the meal you really need to feel unwelcome and completely unwanted.  You need to feel as though you should have paid to sit down, and are even unsure if you are sitting in the right spot.  If you aren't staring longingly at the kids table, wishing you were over there, that turkey just won't taste right.

Getting Old

     I am getting old, it's a fact, just ask my kids.  My birthday is rolling around again tomorrow, and when my daughter found out she asked me how old I was going to be.  I told her that I'd be turning 37, and her jaw dropped open, her eyes grew wide with wonder, and amazement, and she simply replied - "Wow, that's old.".  Both of my boys quickly agreed with her and just like that, I was declared old.  The kids are our future, and mine just collectively decided that I'm a relic of the past.

Finding My Bromance

     Making new male friends as an adult is very hard, at least it is for me.  As a kid it was so easy.  You could meet another little boy at a playground and be blood brothers by lunchtime.  It was just so simple back then.  You'd just walk up and say 'Cool big wheel, wanna be friends?'.  They'd say sure and, next thing you know, your riding big wheels with your new best friend.  By the end of the day you might even have a sleepover at his house.  As an adult male, if you meet a guy you like, and want to be friends with him, it's very hard to close the deal.
     It even feels kind of homo erotic making a move like asking for his phone number.  At least it does to me, and I'm quite secure in my sexuality but, it's just so tough to take that leap.  I mean what if he rejects you.  Now your standing there swimming in a sea of palpable awkwardness from the rejection.  Then, your definitely gay.  Gay, and rejected.  You would have been better off to have just gave him a surprise reach around.  Y'all would be in the same awkward situation but, at least then, there would be a damn good reason for it.

Elitists and how to care for them

     If our society has taught us anything it's that rich people are simply just much better and far more important than us lazy, mostly toothless, uneducated poor people.  We underachieving 99% should know this by now, no matter how slow we may be.  Movies, television, and magazines tell us everyday yet, some of us still just don't seem to understand what our role in society is here at the bottom.
     Well, I'll tell you what our role as the poor is - our role is to care for the rich like they need and deserve.  We need rich people in a capitalist society so we better learn to care for them or they just might take their money to foreign countries, who know how to respect and care for elites, just like they have already taken most of their jobs.  So, buck up Americans, we need to respect our rich, and learn to love the scraps they give us to live on because, they don't even have to give us those scraps, they are just better than us, and that is just how it is.

Dave Chappelle Tribute

I think every group of black guys should have at least one white guy in it so, when the sh*t goes down, there is someone to talk to the cops. -- Dave Chappelle

     David Khari Webber Chappelle was born August 24th, 1973 in Washington D.C. As a youth he was inspired by the comedy of Eddie Murphy and Richard Pryor.  It was also in D.C. that Dave found his love of stand-up comedy, and his Mom would take him to clubs to perform.  Even as a young teen it was clear to the other comedians that he was gifted at the art.  Chappelle was known for his wit, and always fresh material as well as his natural delivery and confident stage presence.  

Conversations With Nana - The Stripper Pole

     I love to visit my Nana.  She is the sweetest old broad in the whole world.  Plus, she's always got plenty of bitchin' hard candy in her candy bowl whenever I come over. 
     My Nana is old school, from the Great Depression era.  She had a hard knock life.  I like that about her though because it made her wise and I really love to hear all her wisdom just about as much as she loves to share the story's of her younger days with me over freshly rolled blunts and whiskey or maybe a few cold beers at Hooters.  You know, wherever she is the most comfortable.  I always let Nana pick where we hang out.

Homophobia Is Gay

Does this pic look a little gay to you..?

     What is more queer than being uncomfortable around gay people? I'm asking literally not figuratively. I think that being homophobic is more gay than actually being gay is.  To quote a favorite comic of mine, Patton Oswalt, being homophobic is, 'gayer than 8 guys doing 9 guys'. 
     Sorry to be so blunt but, to me, it really is. I mean for one, why would you even care who other people are having sex with? You don't have to be there, or watch them, and your not even involved at all, so wtf would even bother you about it? It simply would have to be that just the knowledge of who they choose to have sex with has made you imagine yourself in a same sex situation, and that thought of you with a same sex partner has made you uncomfortable. Because otherwise why would you care?  There is a simple answer to that question.., you wouldn't.

Are you Laughing at Life, 2?

     Life can be very hard, painful, and extremely stressful as well.  Luckily, it can also be hilarious and it often is too, if you know where and how to look at it.  That is what is so healing and necessary about the art of comedy.  That is also why I love doing it so much.  I love making people laugh.  It's like a drug to me and it is to most of the other comics that I know as well.  
     We comics are mostly all just a bunch of sad clowns who see the world through a skewed view that allows us to translate it into humor.  We need our audience as much or more than they need us.  The relationship between the comedian and the audience is a very intimate one even if it doesn't fully show on the surface.  The audience benefits from the release of the laughter and the comic benefits from the audience's laughter itself.
     Making people laugh is like our own version of cheap therapy, and it's our anti-depressant drug too.  It is for me at least.  Making people laugh and feeling that acceptance and praise is why I do it.  It's what drives me to write and perform.  I love to entertain people and hear them laugh.  I need it, it's my drug, and I've been addicted to it ever since I first stepped onto a stage and felt it.