Laughing News, vol7

Laughing News, vol7

Comedy news you can trust

In The Headlines...

     Cookie Monster attacked a 2yr old boy in Times Square because the child's parents couldn't supply the $2 for the picture they had taken with the monster quickly enough.  When Cookie Monster demanded his payment and was told he would have to wait while the father of the boy got some cash, he became enraged and pushed the stroller so hard the boy flew out into the street.  Elmo, who also posed for the picture, couldn't be reached for comment.

     A southwest Ohio day care worker has been charged with assault for biting a 5 year old child to teach him not to bite others.  The 56 year old day care worker, who is apparently a moron, was released without bail because our justice system is inept.

     In Montana a man who doesn't carry a wallet on advice from his chiropractor has $500 eaten by his dog.  When he had stopped for dinner he left the dog in the car with 5 $100 bills and a $1 bill.  The dog ate all the hundreds but left the dollar unharmed because it's all about the Benjamin's baby.  The man salvaged the scraps of the money from the dogs droppings, and sent them into the treasury in hopes of having it returned to him.

News On The Go...

-- The secret ingredient to making all holiday meals delicious has been discovered. Click here to find out more.

-- Finding a friend as an adult male is really hard. For more click here.

-- Poor people need to learn how to care for rich people like they deserve. If your a poor person that needs to find out what the rich need from you click here.

-- Stripping has changed a lot throughout the years. Click here to read Nana's view on the changes.


Celebrity News...

     Lindsey Lohan was recently on Late Night with David Letterman and in the interview she stated that she viewed her upcoming stint in rehab as a blessing.  This reporter would have to agree with her because she belongs in a prison cell. Good thing she is a celebrity huh?  Otherwise the legal system would apply to her like it does to all of us regular folks.