Fat Guy Candy Reviews - Starburst 'Fruity Slushies'
I decided that simply providing you with all of the comedy that you could possibly need all in one place wasn't enough. I decided that I have so many other great God given gifts that I could share with you here as well and honestly, some of them are so cool that I'd frankly be a bit of a jerk if I didn't share them with you. After all, you do come here and read/support my dribble, at least I hope you do. If you do I love you, if not it's OK I like you too, we're good. So in return for your support whenever I try out a new candy flavor, which is often, I'll share with you here what my mouths experience was with that candy for you to use in your future candy selections. We're starting out with the new 'Fruity Slushies' by Starburst flavor because that was what I had picked out. I separated the flavors and decided to start off with the blue one because it's wrapper was a really cool shade of blue. Below is what we thought of each flavor and it's official Fat Guy Candy Grade.
Blue Raspberry Chew
This chew tasted almost exactly like I would expect dish soap to taste if I added a little sugar to it. Not something that you would probably ever do with dish soap and a really bad flavor for a candy. Dish soap in your mouth was a punishment for being a smartass if your Mom was like mine. Basically, I do not know what Starburst was thinking with this one. That being said, I've never eaten a fresh blue raspberry before so I really can't say for sure if they actually do taste like dish soap or not.
Blue Raspberry Chew Grade - Bad Chew F+
Cherry Splash Chew
This one is more like it right away because it tastes like candy which, first off is a big plus right off the bat. You want your candy to taste like candy first and foremost. I liked this one but I had to remember that Cherry Splash had the added benefit of following Blue Raspberry, which was awful, in this little taste test so I was also a little harder on it. Real good candy cherry flavor is the first thing that came to mind. It was also different enough from just regular cherry that you could tell but it wasn't too much. All in all Cherry Splash was a solid flavor chew.
Cherry Splash Chew Grade - Solid Chew B+
Strawberry Lemonade Chill Chew
This ones name was really fun to say first off, but in the end it ended up being a disappointing flavor. It didn't taste like Strawberry Lemonade at all it kind of tasted like fruit punch except it was somehow even fruitier than fruit punch. I couldn't make out strawberry or lemonade in this one at all. This chew was just a sugary fruit glob that wasn't either really all that pleasant or unpleasant. I didn't like it or hate it really. Alright chew, I'm mostly just curious about the name choice on this one.
Strawberry Lemonade Chill Chew Grade - Decent Chew C
Citrus Slush Chew
Oh my God this is why I buy new candies, this one made it all worth it. I don't know how my mouth knew to save Citrus Slush for last but it did and it was right to do so. I loved Citrus Slush Chew, it was really orangey but not overpowering and it actually did taste like a slushie. I think this is the flavor that must have inspired this combination of flavors to make the 'Fruity Slushies' Chew line. If so, I see why. Good base for a flavor combo but all the others mostly need improvement.
Citrus Slush Chew Grade - Awesome Chew A+
Overall Grade For 'Fruity Slushies' by Starburst - Decent Overall C+
I finished with the Citrus Slush Chew which, as I've already stated, is my new favorite candy so I really wanted to praise the collection overall even though deep down I knew I couldn't because overall the other flavors drag it all down. I wasn't mad that I bought my pack of 'Fruity Slushies' but I was disappointed and I doubt very seriously that I will ever buy a second package. I would, on the other hand buy a box of 1000 Citrus Slush Chews in a fat guy buying some candy second so Starburst you can get on that any time you want to so I can buy it.